Happiness Points: #1-7

Peace to Live By Happiness Points: #1-7 - Daniel Litton
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[Transcript may not match broadcasted sermon word for word]

Preface

       I hope everyone is doing well today.

       I believe you have made a wise choice—that is, in your decision to pursue happiness, to increase your overall level of happiness. Certainly so, happiness isn’t some sinful worldly concept, reserved for those who would eat and be marry, but rather, happiness is for the Christian—for God created us to be happy in the first place. But as we will find with most things in life, with happiness comes the importance of choice. Therefore, one chooses happiness.

       In completing the Study of James this past Spring, I think we realized that with proper intent, our lives can in fact be better. For sure. There are better ways to look at the things of life, and implementations we can make as we live our lives. I saw the potential for an abundance of encouragement in people, and I think that was certainly accomplished. One thing is for sure. The pastor or Bible teacher is going to run into individuals probably on a daily basis who need encouragement. Especially now, in our heavy world.

       The happiness points I have come up with, those which we are about to go over for the next many months, both before the holidays and after, are the best things I have come across in life. These are the choice pointers that have made my life better, and certainly have the power to do that for anyone who puts them into practice. These haven’t just come from happy times, but more than half have come through difficult life experiences, as you should expect. As I have taught, it is in those experiences that we learn the most.

       My goal and hope is that you find these points useful, and that even if you were to just put some of them into practice, your happiness would increase leaps and bounds. We have peace in Jesus, so let us add some happiness to that. As always, I encourage you to email me with any questions or comments you may have at:
daniel@peacetoliveby.org. Now, in our foundation of peace, let us pursue happiness.

Happiness Point #1: Decisions Made Out of Fear Don’t Work

       Sometimes in our lives, we feel we need to make a decision about something ‘for fear that’ if we don’t, we will somehow lose it. But what I have found to be true over the years is that decisions made out of fear simply don’t work. In other words, if we are approaching making a choice while standing on the ground of fear, that decision will be one we come to regret later. We can take a certain job because we are afraid something better won’t come along; we can sell our prized possession because we are afraid we won’t have the money we need and would rather see it in the bank. Fear makes us do stupid things. It causes us to make dumb choices.

       Inside of ourselves, we are instructed not to be living by fear. Rather, when fear has been passed by, that empowers us. That is when we can see love for what it is and even start to exercise our self-control. Making choices out of fear is not coming from either of these areas. It’s not coming from love because love doesn’t come out of fear. Perfect love expels and repels fear. And it’s not coming from self-control because a surrendered state of mind is one where fear isn’t calling the shots.

       This is where we make use of patience. When we are surrendered, that means we are okay with whatever the outcome. When we are okay with whatever the outcome, there is no urgency to act—to try to arrange circumstances so that we get what we want. Rather, in a surrendered state, it is God’s power that demonstrates itself on our belief, and we simply sit back and watch. We go along for the ride, instead of trying to drive the car.

       So, whenever you realize you are contemplating a decision out of fear, take a step back and observe the situation as if you were outside of yourself. Ask yourself the real reason you are about to make this decision. What is it that you are afraid will happen if you don’t? Then, cast that care to the One who is greater than you, and decide at that moment not to make the decision out of fear. You will find that soon enough the good choice will present itself to you.

Happiness Point #2: Surrender - Use the Daniel 3:16 Method

       In the Book of Daniel, there is the story of three guys who find themselves in a bind when they refuse to worship an idol that the king of their time had setup for all to worship. When this reaches the ears of the king, he calls and questions the guys. Their names are Shadrach, Meshach, and Abednego. The guys refuse to give in and the king orders them executed in a hot, fiery furnace. It is at this point that what they say to the king is particularly interesting. Rather than becoming angry or trying to reason with him, they say to him that their God has the power to deliver them. But, even if he doesn’t, they say, they still won’t worship the king’s false idol.

       What we can learn from the response of these men is what I call the Daniel 3:16 Method. It is in there response that started in verse 16 of Daniel chapter 3. Shadrach, Meshach, and Abednego were surrendered to whatever the outcome might be. They were okay if God rescues them from the fiery furnace, and they were okay with the result if that didn’t happen. They just wanted the king to be sure that they were not going to bow down and do what was wrong, what was against their hearts, what would offend the God of the Universe.

       Therefore, in any situation, we can apply the Daniel 3:16 Method. When there is something we want God to do for us or that we just want to happen in our lives, we need to be surrendered to the outcome. We need to be able to step back and say, “It’s okay if God does what I want (whatever that want is), and it’s okay if he doesn’t.” If it is something we are just hoping happens inside our minds, we need to be able to say, “It’s good if it happens, but I’m okay if it doesn’t. It’s not going to bother me.” By thinking and acting in this way, we allow God to do for us whatever he decides to do. We release any restraint on power so that power can flow freely to let happen what is going to happen in our lives.

       We know what happened with Shadrach, Meshach, and Abednego. Their surrendered state actually allowed God to save them as he chose to do so. And it was in a big way—so much so that it appears Jesus himself was standing there in the middle of the fiery furnace with them. All of this worked to turn the heart of the king. He was once against their God, and now he was making a decree for him. Now the king revered their God’s name as holy, as special. And after all this, God led the king to give these three servants a promotion within the kingdom. So, what at first appeared to be a very bad situation, and one that may in fact end even in death, was turned around so that God’s name was praised and his servants promoted.

Happiness Point #3: Drop that One More Thing and Go to Bed

       We all become wearied from all the work we do by the time we are ready to turn in for the day. It’s just at that moment, it seems like there is that temptation to want to do just ‘one more thing.’ That problem is, that fifteen, thirty, or even forty-five minutes we spend doing that ‘one more thing’ can often cost us precious sleep. This is especially true if we are already behind schedule. It can be so tempting to watch one more episode of your favorite T.V. show, read one more chapter of that excellent book, or spend just a little more time surfing the net.

       The key to this dilemma is to decide beforehand, earlier in the day, when you are going to go to bed. Most are probably going to want to make it the same time every night. The decision makes the idea become a rule. So, when the time comes, let’s say it’s the stroke of twelve midnight, you know you’ve already decided that’s your bedtime. In that case, you stop whatever you’re doing, and make your way to your bed. The prior decision allows for the self-control to manifest itself at the proper time. It’s simply just too hard a lot of times to make the right choice when the temptation is at its highest. It’s too easy to justify doing the thing we know, if we weren’t so full of happiness, wouldn’t help us.

       I think what you will find as you put this simple but effective discipline into practice is that you will feel better in the mornings and during your days. It may be more subtle at first, but as the days pass by, that forty-five minutes saved every night is going to add up. Just think, if you do this for four days, you’ve earned another three hours of sleep. That could be a half nights rest of some of us. So, the little things add up, and when we sow a little here and a little there, we realize we start to reap the good fruit of feeling better later in time.

Happiness Point #4: Life is Groundhog Day

       If you’ve seen the movie Groundhog Day (1993), you can remember that the main character, who is a local T.V. weatherman, get’s trapped in a mysterious cycle of living the same exact day over and over. In his case, it is actually Groundhog Day. But in our case, in real life, we find ourselves much in the same circumstances. Our days seem to go by very similar to others. Sometimes strikingly similar, so that we even pass the same cars at the same time on our commute into our workplace.

       The truth is, life is just a series of similar events most of the time. Sure, there are vacations, fun nights out with friends, dates, family events, whatever, but these things are overshadowed by the routine of life. For some, when they first realize is, they are going to get depressed. For others, they will embrace it. It is this second approach that is the right one. We all need to embrace this fact and live our lives so that good quality emanates from them. It is quality that is way more important than quantity.

       Time passes by. We measure the seasons in days, months, years, and decades. If we don’t gain a focus on life, life will just go on and on randomly until one day it stops. We can go through life in a haze, or we can clear that haze and become aware of our surroundings, our routines, and the people that are involved with us. Only the realization of the importance of our lives can then spur us to take proper action. We need to step outside of ourselves and our lives for a moment and see what’s going on.

       When we are out and about, we need to be that nice person. We need to be that person who shows extra care for others when perhaps others do not. We need to enjoy our careers, whatever we do, because after all a large part of our time is spent doing whatever we do for a living. We should value family time, work while having fun, enjoy good hobbies, and enjoy the time taken to rest in doing nothing. It is only when we make the most use of the time that our lives have that rich quality. This is something we should start doing today because we have no idea how much time we have left.

Happiness Point #5: Seek Counsel on Big Decisions

       General George Washington learned during the Revolutionary War that seeking counsel on making the next strategic decision in the war was a wise one. It is said that Washington would gather around his greatest Generals and confidants, and with map in front of them, they would decide what to do next. Washington would purpose one thing, and his men would sometimes argue with him, but sometimes that would present other methods. If Washington realized another’s way seemed better than his way, he would choose to go that other way. He would choose the advice of the man under him, even though he was in charge.

       What Washington did was wise. He realized that he himself did not possess all the answers. And this was true even though he had been placed in-charge of such a large army. He could have said, “Well, Providence has placed me in-charge, so I know best.” But it was Washington’s humility that made him great. Without that humility, more battles would have been lost, and certainly, in all-likelihood, we’d all still be living under the Crown today. We know that toward the end of the War when he still desired in his heart to take New York City back, that he went against his personal desire on the advice of others to capture British General Cornwallis in Yorktown. Again, that deferment of his own wish caused the American side to win the war.

       And how do our lives look? Are we in the habit of seeking counsel with big decisions? It doesn’t matter whether we are introverted or extroverted, the point is that all of us need advice from time to time. And once that advice is gained, I think sometimes it is good to let it sit a couple of days if possible given the circumstance. This is because sometimes only clarity is gained by patiently thinking about a thing, or letting it sit a while not thinking about it, and then returning to it. Sometimes great clarity can be achieved by waiting to act for all the options to show their true colors.

       But it’s also important for us, as Washington demonstrated, that sometimes we have to turn aside from the opinion or solution that we had, and go with the advice of another. This is because we are not in possession of all the answers like we often think we are. Sometimes others can see things we can’t, and this may be from their own personal past experiences and failures. Other people have been through different types of situations in life, and have gained insight through those situations. It takes humility to go with another’s choice. We have to choose whether we will look bad for a moment while swallowing our pride and going with the other person, or whether we will look bad for a while later on when we arrogantly stuck with our choice and are now paying the consequences.

Happiness Point #6: Make Your Devotional Time in the Morning

       Devotional time sometimes gets moved around for us because we do not want to become legalistic in our lives. There is the feeling, “I don’t have to do my devotional time in the morning. I’ll do it later. I’m too tired to do it!” And that is true. We don’t have to have our devotional time in the morning. I have found, however, that any day I haven’t, that day seems to go by in an aimless direction, like a dog let outside without a leash or, as it was said of old, a group of sheep without its shepherd.

       I like to have morning devotional time for a couple of reasons. For one, it sets my mind in the right direction for the day. Whether you read the Scriptures or read a good book focused on God things, on our character development, you are setting a structure for your mind for the day. You are working out your mind, much like the physical body is worked out in the exercise room or gym. We know our stomach needs food at some point after we wake up, well I think it’s also good to feed our mind something that will help it throughout the day.

       And it’s not just great literature that helps us, but really it’s the time that we focus on spending with the most important person in our lives. And who is that? Well, that’s God. It’s our relationship with him that is the most significant thing that we have in our lives. All other things can change, can be gone in fact. But not that. If we spend time with God, we find that we feel better. We find that we feel more aligned with how we are, as people. We keep morality in check. It’s impossible to live immorally and then go fellowship with the Creator, at least, I don’t think I could do that.

       So, if we spend at least twenty minutes, some on Scriptural things, and some as time spent with God, I don’t think we can go wrong. I don’t see any better way to structure the day. I don’t see any other solid ground with which the days can then be built upon. We all have a tendency to forget the important things that have been taught to us. With the forgetfulness then, why not refresh the mind first thing? Why not give it an advantage? Why not seek to better your day, your life’s experience? Help your mind and help yourself. Seek to please God, and he will be be seeking to please you.

Happiness Point #7: Have a Good Presentation

       If we look good, we feel good, and we are attractive to others. At least, that’s been my experience. I don’t buy the most expensive clothes, actually, far from it I think. But I like to have nice clothes, clothes that are in good shape, and are colorful at times, and clothes that fit my body well. The first reason I do this is that having these nice clothes makes me feel good. It would be no fun walking around looking bad, with a hole in my shirt, or wearing one that the color is faded really bad. People, to some degree, judge us by our appearance. To what level depends on the person, but we all do it. So, why not look good?

       It doesn’t take a lot of money these days to have good looking clothes. Whether it is the discount department stores, online retailers, or even a second-hand store, nice clothes can be had for much lower cost. Now, some people don’t think it’s right to dress too nice. They think the Scriptures forbid it. That’s a matter of one’s opinion. I will say that the people we know as ‘plain,’ the Amish, are oftentimes dressed nicer than most middle of the road Christians. They have better presentations than many, and they sew all their stuff at home. Most of it isn’t store bought.

       I know people who make a lot of money and yet don’t dress nice. They don’t even dress okay. They dress at a lower standard, one of which I think is too low. And what does that make we feel of them? Well, when I think of them I think ‘cheap.’ Being honest, it’s what first comes to mind. Or, perhaps it’s because they are out of order in some other area of their lives? Maybe their mortgage payment is too high, or their car payment, or they own too much of this or too much of that. That’s not a valid excuse, though. We should not overspend in one area to the point that we have to neglect another area.

       Having that right, good presentation—not careless all the time—can go a long way. It’s not solely that people think well of us because of this presentation, but it adds to our character. It is one of the pieces to the whole. Being out of order in this area distracts. And besides, who wants what you have if you’re not pleasant to begin with? So, for your own sake and for the sake of others, I recommend finding that normal groove. If you’re slacking in this area, perhaps it’s time to make a change. I personally think you’ll find more happiness this way.

- Daniel Litton